The Together Guide chat

website

We all know relationships takes work, but what is that work, and how do we do it? Reformed divorce lawyer Erik Newton explores these questions and many more in a series of intimate and honest interviews with real couples.

POPULAR TAGS:

S2 E19 - Season Ender: The Badass Fat Ass (Apr 30th, 2018)

Today’s Episode – number 131 – is the last episode of season two, which means we’re off for the summer! We’ll be back in September with more interviews!

Our guest today, Rachel Dwight is a self described super fat, queer, transgender, disabled superhero. And I’ll add that they’re a force of nature as well! We discuss all of those identities, and we cover a fundamental truth we should all internalize: everyone is entitled to pleasure, no matter their body type.

Check out Rachel’s amazing blog:...

TAGS:

S2 E18 From Shame To Intimacy - Megan and Brave (Mar 19th, 2018)

Today’s conversation is about shame and how we can use it to explore the darker corners of our relationships. Our guests today, Megan and Brave have done some very useful work in this area - and specifically on what they refer to as “male shame.” Listen in to hear what they mean by that!

I’ve you’d like to learn more about Megan and Brave, check out their website: https://www.thealchemyofwe.com/ - these two do some fantastic relationship coaching both on the individual and group levels, so ch...

TAGS:

S2 E17 - Catholic Swingers – It's Definitely A Thing (Mar 5th, 2018)

Today's episode is about a couple you would never expect might have a secret life. Penn and Page, our guests today, grew up Catholic, married young, had six kids, and were perfectly content living a predictable life, until one day Penn had an idea...

 

---

If you’d like to learn more about Penn and Page, you can find their podcast - Swinger Diaries on iTunes or any podcast player, and you can find their website at https://swingerdiaries.wordpress.com/

If you liked what you heard today, please...

TAGS:

S2 E16 - Emotional Labor (Jan 29th, 2018)

A cultural conversation has been simmering recently about the concept of emotional labor.  It’s a critical conversation to our relationships, but not many of us know what it means. Today on the podcast, we learn all about what it is, and what to do about it from our guests, Gemma and Rob Hartley.

Gemma is a well known journalist, and recently wrote an article for Harpers about emotional labor that went viral. To learn more about Gemma and her writings, check out her website: gemmahartley.com....

TAGS:

S2 E15 We All Must Face Our Demons (Jan 19th, 2018)

Our guest today - Iris McAlpin is a survivor of multiple experiences with sexual abuse, and having recovered from those, she has some unique ideas about how we all should be relating to the perpetrators of these kind of abuses. She also has quite a bit too say about the healing process that’s available to all of us after abuse.

If you’d like to learn more about Iris and her programs, you can find her website at: http://irismcalpin.com - I’ll put links to that in our show notes as well.

Don’t ...

TAGS:

E2 S14 The Power Of A Shared Narrative (Dec 30th, 2017)

Our guests today, Ned and Dorcas share a story about a depression that lasted nearly five years. They not only survived that depression as a couple, but built a massively successful company during that time and started a family that’s thriving. This episode is about the tools they used to manage. 

Dorcas has written a book about the experience called: START, LOVE, REPEAT - How to Stay in Love with Your Entrepreneur in a Crazy Start-up World. You can find out more about Dorcas at her website: ...

TAGS:

S2 E13 Rape and Reconciliation (Dec 11th, 2017)

The title of this episode says what’s it’s about: rape and reconciliation. If rape is a topic you find difficult to hear about, you might want to take it easy with this episode. 

But know that this story is also about reconciliation. It’s about the healing process that’s available to all of us.

Megan Flamer, our guest today is a mindfulness trainer and former broadcast journalist. She works on projects that marry human behavior, communication and tech. She creates retreats all over the world ...

TAGS:

S2 E12 Be Your Own Sexpert (Nov 30th, 2017)

Our guest today, Nenna Joiner, is an African American Lesbian porn producer and sex shop owner in downtown Oakland. Our conversation ranges all over the sex universe from impotence, to getting on your knees in church and in sex, to whether Lesbians are the new gay men, to - of course - toys and porn.

If you’d like to find Nenna online or meet her in person, she’s often at her shop, Feelmore in Oakland. You can find their website at: https://feelmore510.com/

If you liked what you heard today, ...

TAGS:

S2 E12 Be Your Own Sexpert (Nov 30th, 2017)

Our guest today, Nenna Joiner, is an African American Lesbian porn producer and sex shop owner in downtown Oakland. Our conversation ranges all over the sex universe from impotence, to getting on your knees in church and in sex, to whether Lesbians are the new gay men, to - of course - toys and porn.

TAGS:

Thanksgiving and Death (Essay) (Nov 20th, 2017)

We are community. We are our friends and family, and we cannot know ourselves without them.

TAGS:

S2E10 Two Mormons Walk Into A Strip Club... (Nov 6th, 2017)

Today’s episode kicks of the first of several stories on the topic of pornography. 

Today, we’re hearing from Nate and Angilyn. Nate is the founder of a website and a podcast about marriage called First7Years.com. He’s also done a lovely TedX talk about love. He and Angilyn are both lifelong Mormons. They were both raised to believe that porn was inherently evil. They have a different view about it now, but I’ll let them tell the story.

In other news, we're planning a relationship retreat, an...

TAGS:

S2E10 Two Mormons Walk Into A Strip Club... (Nov 6th, 2017)

Today’s episode kicks of the first of several stories on the topic of pornography. 

Today, we’re hearing from Nate and Angilyn. Nate is the founder of a website and a podcast about marriage called First7Years.com. He’s also done a lovely TedX talk about love. He and Angilyn are both lifelong Mormons. They were both raised to believe that porn was inherently evil. They have a different view about it now, but I’ll let them tell the story.

TAGS:

S2 E9 If Not Everything, Nothing - Thomas and Lauren (Oct 30th, 2017)

The thing about the choice to stay or to go in any given relationship, is that we can never know what might have been. There’s no control group to test against for happiness in our life choices. We only know what’s right here, right now.

Our guests this week – Thomas and Lauren – are facing that question of choice. How do you know when it’s right, and how do you know when it’s wrong? In some sense, you can’t know - you just have to take action.

In other news, we're planning a relationship ret...

TAGS:

S2 E8 The Fascinations of Taboo and Turn On (Oct 17th, 2017)

Our episode today is about the unpredictable results of difficult conversations. There’s gold in those hills if you have the courage to dig.

Our guests today are avid prospectors, and they have a lot to teach us about the process of emotional inquiry.

If you’d like to learn more about Bob, you can find his website at: http://bobschwenkler.com/

You can find Natalie and her new podcast, Taboo and Turn On at: http://natalievartanian.com/

In other news, we're planning a relationship retreat, and ...

TAGS:

S2 E8 The Fascinations of Taboo and Turn On (Oct 17th, 2017)

Our episode today is about the unpredictable results of difficult conversations. There’s gold in those hills for your relationships if you have the courage to dig.

Our guests today are avid prospectors, and they have a lot to teach us about the process of emotional inquiry.

TAGS:

S2 E7 - All The Relationship Tools You Never Learned (Oct 9th, 2017)

Last week during our interview with Michael and Sara, you may remember they told us about a therapist they had worked with over Skype named Al Turtle. Well I reached out to Al, and today we’ve got him on the show!

It was a long interview. The portion of the conversation we’re playing focuses mostly on a specific debate: is all the inquiry into childhood trauma really necessary, or should we focus instead on behavior? Al’s answer is a good one. Listen in to find out what he says.

You can find ...

TAGS:

S2 E7 - All The Relationship Tools You Never Learned (Oct 9th, 2017)

Last week during our interview with Michael and Sara, you may remember they told us about a therapist they had worked with over Skype named Al Turtle. Well I reached out to Al, and today we’ve got him on the show!

It was a long interview. The portion of the conversation we’re playing focuses mostly on a specific debate: is all the inquiry into childhood trauma really necessary, or should we focus instead on behavior? Al’s answer is a good one. Listen in to find out what he says.

TAGS:

S2 E7 Sometimes You're Gonna Hate (Oct 2nd, 2017)

Every once in awhile you're going to hear yourself say the words: "I hate you" to the one you love. Not that we're encouraging it, but let's just normalize the fact that sometimes, anger and frustration bubble over into something we're not proud of.

Today's episode is about learning from those feelings, and moving forward. Our guests today, Michael and Sara have a lot to say on the topic, and their story is an inspiring one -- but I'll let them tell it rather than rewrite it here.

You can fin...

TAGS:

S2 E6 - Your Type Doesn't Matter (Sep 25th, 2017)

So long as we’re stuck on an internal idea of perfection, we can never fully experience the magic of what’s right before our eyes. That's why searching for one's "type," or the "perfect match" can be such a dead end.

Our guests today, Jo and Nick–understand this better than most, and share with us their insights about how to be in the relationship you actually have.

Jo Piazza is an author with six very popular titles under her belt, and she’s also a rather well loved travel journalist. Most r...

TAGS:

S2E5 Rules Of Play (Sep 18th, 2017)

Successful couples seem to have an instinct about where to find those moments of giggly surrender that are so effective at helping us all drop the drama and reconnect. This skill is absolutely learnable. It’s not a matter of luck, it’s a matter of practice. 

Ryan and Jordana, are guests this week, are are exceptionally talented in the area of simple fun. They’re both musicians in addition to their other passions (it’s their music played throughout this episode), and their playfulness comes po...

TAGS: